Archive for the ‘spiritual’ Category

Thank You Mister

April 23, 2009

Today, I realized, that I don’t know what is love. Or how to love.

I thought it was love, but it was not.

What I feel is urge to own, to control, to posses, to limit. Plus so many fear. Of loosing, of separated, of lonelyness, of etc. Oftenly, out of jealously. And greed. And egoistic lusts.

So I thank you Mr Zaman, for taking my beloved angel away. Thank you for ruining my heart. Thank you for destroying my fake love. Thank you for saving her from my stupidities. From the stupid illusions.

I wish you both blessed life, full with true love, and happiness. Forever.

I thank you from the deepest of my heart.

Thank You.

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Compassionate Butcher

April 22, 2009

A homo asked Mr Butcher, “Why are you keep saying that?”

“What?” Mr Butcher feel disturbed. He continue to slaughters the next cow while his lips whispering something.

“That, the mantra you said in each killing. Why you saying it while killing the poor cows? What is that means? ”

“This is a must. My religion required me to do it in each killing. Because we only eat meat which killed in the name of God. It means: ‘in the name of God, the most compassionate’.”

The homo confused. “What kind of compassion which allowed killing peaceful animals? Are you worshipping a bloodthirsty God?”

“Shut up you blasphemer! Go away!” Mr Butcher got angry, he hate when someone else judging his God as bad.

….

I am sleepy. You have to continue the story by yourself.

stopping the poisonous addiction

April 17, 2009

It was Friday afternoon. The time go to mosque to do the Friday Prayer. I park my bike near one, instead of going to the mosque, i go to the bookstore near it. Spending some time there. Reading some books and then leaving without buying any. *evil*

There, inside that book store, i realized how the fear, planted by my religious teacher since i was a child, still rooted deeply inside my mind. Even though i freed myself from the fear of sin, and fear of god wrath. Still, i got disturbed by the fear of other people might think about myself.

When some religious looking girls look at me, and their eyes said “how pity, this handsome guy is not religious, he will go to hell for sure”. Or i worried, how if i met some friend who will asks why i did not go to the mosque. Or, how if i met old teachers who will ask me the same questions.

Somehow, i struggling to remind myself: “So what if I am not religious”; “they are not thinking what you think they are, and even if they are, so what?”; “So what if I’m  a sinner and go to hell?”; “Stop that fictious guilty feeling!”

Haha, this fear based religious teaching really poisoned me.

But I am optimist. I successfully freed myself from smoke addiction, i believe i can free myself from this religious addiction.

Should i do it with a friend?

April 15, 2009

Is it wrong if i make love with a friend without love?

How it will affect to my life, to her life, to the people around us?

What risks will arise?

How to do it safely? Hehe

Power from behind the door of death

April 12, 2009

No body knows what is behind the door of death. They who already knows, will trapped there, they wont back here to tell us. Even if somehow they managed to get back here, and tell us their story, there is no way to proof it. Unless, the listener go to the door, and look what is behind it by themself, and trapped there.

Because of that, I think, everyone have the right to create (and believe) their own story. I, for example, could believe that after we die, our soul go to mighty recycle bin of love, which is created by black haired sexy godess with small boobs. There, the bad souls will be tortured by bad sex, and more bad sex. While the good souls will be rewarded by good sex, and more good sex. And if you dont believe my story, you are a sinner, a kuffar whose hearts closed by God.. Euh, I mean Goddess.

Based on that crazy story, I can build some set of rules. Maybe a religion. Which deeds considered as good, which is bad, and how much reward will given for each of them.

Unfortunately, not every human aware about this. And among the aware ones, not many who have enough creativity to build our own story. Or guts to ‘sells’ their product on the market owned by mainstreamed faiths.

Rather than think and create, we choose to believe the story made by other. Following mainstream or our parents. Take it for granted. Put our faith on any storytellers and crapmakers we love.

We give them the power to build religions and sects which puts many rules and fear upon our life. Give them the power to divide us into different groups based on believes. Give them the power to make us hate each other, and create war based on our differences.

What we get from the storytellers? Warranty of happy heaven in the afterlife. Warranty of justice, for everyone will get the punishment and rewards for everything they did.

What the storytellers get? Power. Power to control our life. To tell us what to do and dont.